We all grew up listening to fairy tales and are taught to look for prince charming, Mr. Perfect, the guy that brings roses and never says anything wrong. But maybe, just maybe there are guys out there that put on a front, act and treat us as if we are made out of glass. After a few months of dating them we wonder why we feel weak, have no vision other than a fairy tale relationship, which deep down in our hearts we know is fake and won’t last and we completely miss the point.
We as Christians are so religious and rigid when it comes to sin and living right but when it comes to relationships we throw the Word of God in the corner and go about it the world’s way.
When God created man he saw that it was good but something was missing, so He created Eve out of Adams side. He created a helpmate which in Hebrew means life sustainer. In a marriage us women are to sustain our husband, to respect and to love him. There is strength and virtue in that. God says we are the weaker vessel, therefore he gives us a husband that protects and comforts us and loves us as Christ loves the church. The bible says that a husband ought to love his wife as Christ loves the church, it doesn’t say as prince charming ‘woos’ us. Ultimately we need to look at Jesus and realize that the deep desire for prince charming comes true in our relationship with Him, the romance of our lives for eternity, the one who truly gave his life in battle for us so that we might be free and pursue our dreams!
There is absolutely nothing wrong with romantic dates, gifts, acts of service and making your beloved feel loved, figuring out their love language and acting on it. As a matter of fact it is important to have those intimate moments, to open up our hearts to each other and find out what’s going on deep down inside.
In the light of eternity and 50 years down the road though, will you remember that one date in the romantic restaurant, in your cute black dress??? Will that moment sustain your marriage and make your vision for your life bigger?
When you have to take your spouse to the ER and one doctor after the other comes into that little, dirty, uncomfortable room and tells you that you can’t take him home but for the exception of having home health care come to your house – then 15 minutes later the condition has gotten worse and the doctor called hospice to talk to you about possibilities, what then? Another 30 minutes go by and the doctor says you can only take him home on hospice and a hospital bed, oxygen tank and nurse have been ordered to be at your house tonight; his words telling you that your loved one has only a few more weeks to live and they will be very difficult weeks seem like a bad and foggy dream to you. – Believe me those dates won’t matter anymore. In that moment you won’t think about a romantic dinner, nor all the money that was spent on you. The only thing that will get you through those times is God and His promises to you.
When it comes to choosing our mate we ought to run to the Word of God. The bible says that one puts a thousand to flight and two put ten thousand to flight. How come we apply that principle everywhere else but in marriage?
Jesus completes us in every area of life. How can we ‘complete’ Jesus, aka make His dream come true?
Before we ever come to the decision point of marriage we have got to learn to seek God in the secret place and find out what our purpose and destiny in life is. What’s your vision, what are your dreams?
God is so faithful that He placed seeds of vision and dreams into our hearts the moment we were create and he makes them grow throughout our lives. It is our job though to recognize them and take time with Him to define those dreams and visions and make the ground, he placed them on, soft and fruitful. Once you know the plans of God for your life, are excited about them and ready to conquer it will be much easier and saver for you to find your spouse. The spouse God has in store for you will accelerate those dreams, will support you, and complement you in your journey to complete the call of God in your life. The true love God has for your life will have a very similar vision, will want to go the extra mile with you and both of your visions combined will catapult you further and farther towards the goal God has for you than you could have ever thought of or imagined. God wants to bless us in a measure pressed down, shaken together to the overflow. We cannot forget that He wants that also in regards to marriage.
That’s how you can fulfill God’s desire for you and make Jesus’ dream come true. That intimate relationship with Him is the key to your satisfaction and happiness in every area of your life including marriage. You can marry prince charming but if he is not the one God has for you, you will live a miserable, visionless life.
God’s perfect guy for you will turn into prince charming for you God’s way, not the world’s way.
If you choose to go God’s route you will not have a boring moment again, nor will you be visionless. No, you will be excited, and nothing will be able to hold you back to succeed for God.
So go, seek God’s face and know that you are made in His image to know Him and make Him known!