“Bubblous? Bubblous”, as she’s looking at me with her big blue eyes, tucking on my shirt, pointing to the TV.. “Bubblous, Momma, Bubblous Puppies, Momma.” Well, that was a first. Never before has she ever asked to watch a specific TV show. But it was obvious that she was determined to watch Bubble Guppies. The weird thing was that she had only watched it twice before with Daddy and that was a few days back.
So I turned on “Bubblous” because I couldn’t resist. Those eyes, that smile and her sweet voice had me all wrapped around her finger. Plus, why wouldn’t I let her watch a show in which the characters encourage to eat fruit and veggies. Just saying.
So there she sat, on the couch, with her bunny in her arm, smiling from ear to ear.
Over the past year and a half God the Father has revealed Himself, His love, to me more than I ever thought possible. Why? Because the love I have for my daughter, Bailey, opened my eyes to His unconditional love more than ever before. I am amazed about how much I love her daily. When I go grocery shopping, I automatically think about what kind of special treat (doesn’t have to be sugary), I could bring home for her. When I pick her up from Mother’s Day Out I always bring her something, if it’s a coconut water, a fruit pouch, or half of a croissant, just something small to make her feel special. No, I don’t think I spoil her, I just want her to know that she is special and always has a special place in my heart. When I go window shopping, I always have the urge to buy her something. It can be a cute new book, a soft toy, stickers, something with a kitty on it, anything. Today I got her this adorable 99 cent paper folder with a cute cat on it for her Mother’s Day Out report card; just because I know she will love seeing it in her backpack. I also love to take her to the playground, walk to our pond to feed the ducks, go to the nearby town square so that she can see and be in awe of the fountain. Anticipating her pure joyful reaction gets me excited.
“Why?”, you may ask. Just because. That’s the way I tick as a mom. And it strengthens me. I know that may sound weird but it strengthens me because I am reminded of the fact that God loves me so much more than I can ever love my children. The bible says that the joy of the Lord is our strength. The joy of God I have when thinking about all this truly does give me strength.
It gives me strength for those times when my daughter throws an epic fit in the middle of a nice sit down restaurant. It gives me strengths for those times I hear her little cute voice say “No” a thousand times even when she means yes. It gives me strength when she wakes up in the middle of the night after a long day and doesn’t want to go back to sleep because of a stuffy nose or possibly a bad dream. Looking back at the first 6 months of my firstborn daughter’s life, it is the 3am feedings that I have the fondest memories of. Yes, I was exhausted, sleep-walking through life for months, but those times were very sweet. It was hard dragging myself out of bed, walking into her room to feed her. BUT once I saw her sweet face smiling at me and her body relax as soon as she tasted milk it was a moment of perfection.
When Bubble Guppies make you want to buy a puppy for your child.
As much as I want to buy Bailey, my daughter, a puppy right now, I know it’s not time. I am currently 5 months pregnant, Bailey is only 18 months old, my husband has a full time job and is working on finishing his third Masters degree. We have a side business and a ministry and a tiny house. Therefore, it wouldn’t be a good idea to get a dog right now. That doesn’t mean that it won’t happen in the future. Bailey, however, may not understand the importance of that timing just yet. She absolutely loves dogs. She is very shy, and likes to hide from people, but when it comes to puppies, she knows no fear.
The exponentially bigger revelation of The Father’s love for his children that I have received since Bailey was born made me realize once more how good God is. There are so many things that I may want, such as living in a cooler climate, possibly back in Europe. More time to write, financial blessings, life to turn out the way I imagined it for once without all the valleys that we keep having to walk through, and a horse (Haha, yep!). But as much as I may not understand it sometimes; God is saying “Not yet. I’d love to give all these things to you and want to. But you are just not ready yet. There’s so much to learn, so much to grow, so much to experience before it’s time.” Sometimes it’s not even that we aren’t mature enough, there may just be this one circumstance that is out of our control that won’t allow it. It’s not Bailey’s fault that I am pregnant and don’t want to raise a fury baby a few months before giving birth to our second daughter.
So bottom line I want to encourage you with this:
God, the Father, is totally and completely in love with you. He has the best in store for you. He has a plan for you. He has gifts, talents, presents and goodness in store for you that He is excited about giving you. If they aren’t coming right now, there’s a reason for it. In the meantime draw close to Him. Be enamored of Jesus and what He has done for you. Don’t give up. Keep walking, keep growing, keep learning. When you fall, get up, look at Him and know that you know that you know that no matter how your circumstance may look like, He knows it all and wants you to succeed. One day you will get that puppy and it will be perfect.